It’s important to know that it’s okay to cry sometimes. It’s okay to to stop feeling strong and it’s okay to be open with your emotions. An ileostomy bag is something people have to come to terms with in their own time; it’s not something that can be forced nor rushed. Always remember that you are human. Feeling confident with your bag is great, it’s a great boost for others as well as yourself. That level of positivity shows that you can get through whatever life throws at you.
I broke down last night. I think a lack of sleep mixed with various other overwhelming events has taken it’s toll on me. The level of positivity I have managed to maintain has helped me ignore any negativity floating around in my brain, but last night I was unable to escape that. But today, I feel good. I feel a sense of relief that I have pushed that pessimism out of my body.
Some people see breaking down as a sign of weakness, but for me it’s the opposite. Breaking down is being true to yourself. It is letting yourself realise that there is more than what meets the eye. It is knowing that you are feeling. And what you are feeling is real.
Ileostomy surgery is a traumatic experience, but it doesn’t have to be a life-changing one. It’s understandable to spring between different emotions, everybody deals with things differently. It is normal to be scared, it is normal to feel down and it is normal to question how you’re feeling completely.
It’s hard to deal with things when you feel the subject itself is pushed into such a hidden agenda, but it doesn’t have to be that way. There is so much support out there. Sometimes it’s easier to talk to somebody you don’t know, somebody going through the same experience, somebody with a better level of understanding. It’s more comforting than isolating yourself and your bag. Knowing that there are other people out there just like you is one way of stepping forward. Helping yourself through other people is a great way to build yourself up again.
I have listed below various sites and charities that represent others sharing our experience. Talk to them. Be there for them, just like they will for you.
So if you need to cry, scream or throw things around – do. But don’t let it own tomorrow.