Today, I received my the last ostomy bag order I’ll ever have to make (being that my operation goes all okay). And to be honest, it hit me right where all the emotional bits are, a little. It’s weird, knowing that I’m never going to have to order 60 ostomy bags and a ton of sprays, barrier wipes, disposable bags and dry wipes again. No more worrying as I get down to my last 3 bags and realise I’d forgotten to place an order for next month. I can’t quite get over that today marks one month exactly until my reversal. How does time go so quickly? It doesn’t seem like it’s been two minutes since I first went under the knife. Knowing it’s the last order I’m going to make has made me realise how much other stuff is going to come to and end. I’m no longer going to need to wear countless pairs of support pants. I’m no longer going to be peering down to my stomach to see whether a balloon has magically appeared under my jeans. No more frustration over the sore skin that occurred when I’d run out of barrier wipes. No more…. nope. That’s it. I’m trying to think of a tonne of things that are going to end for me but I just can’t. Because to be honest, my ostomy hasn’t really been there. I mean, it’s been there… but it’s not obvious. And I mean obvious in the sense that it hasn’t made that much of an impact that I can discuss all of the changes that are going to become so much clearer once my next operation is over. It’s strange, the only difference I’m expecting to notice next month is the lightness of my stomach. Like when you enter a hairdressers after a 6 month hair growth where you haven’t had the time for a cut. And suddenly, after they’ve thinned and trimmed your hair you feel like a whole lot of weight has been lifted from your shoulders. Literally.
Ordering my last load of ostomy bags was like saying goodbye to something you once knew. It emphasized the change I was going to face. I must also add, that anybody who has ever faced a difficult ostomy bag order, you MUST use SecuriCare. Orders can be so awkward at times. It can take your GP a decade to complete your prescription, sizes and delivery can be messed up and your doctor may believe you don’t need as much as you think you do. Which is absolute s*** because who’s to say how many times you should be allowed to clean yourself?! Ridiculous. Anyway, SecuriCare have been my guardian angel. I’ve always ordered earliest 2 days in advance with guaranteed next day delivery. I once asked for some barrier wipes and they sent me 7 packs just to be sure I was set for the next couple of months! I have a great relationship with them and I could never go with any other company after being with them for so long. All of my trust sits with them when it comes to ostomy related things.
I’m looking forward to spending less time changing my bag and altering the cuts and sized, and to spending more time focusing on day to day activities. Not to say I’ve been limited in anyway, of course – but sometimes (especially when in a rush) it can be a little time consuming.
All my love xx
P.S. I thought I’d use this old photo for this post, just as a reminder of how far I’ve come. And how much weight I’ve now put on, lol.